Voice of Common Pakistani !!!

[by Syed Roman Ahsan - Dec. 25, 2009]

Dedicated to Truth-Seekers

On Birthday of two great men Jinnah & Jesus (pbuh)

Two men who carried a great cause

The truth lost its face,
The shepherds forgot to pace

Dark clouds stained the sky,
Honesty hid behind lies

The waves ruined the sand castles,
The soldiers laughed at the imprisoned mortals

The tears soaked the young man’s pillow,
While nobody cared for the weeping willow

The garden was left with little colour,
The fortress guards lacked any vigor

The pain was too overwhelming,
And the little girl needed some pampering

Gentlemen and ladies could nowhere be seen,
The curtain dropped without any clean scene

The island offered not any comfort,
The marching ants could not make any effort

Suddenly a voice was heard from the East,
Some hope revived against the spite of the ‘beast’

A silent man emerged from the barren valley,
Trying to balance on the horse of courage

Suffering has made him wise,
Pain has brought him respite

Gold and silver excite him not,
They are only a means to help the have-nots

This world is ever dangerous, he says,
Selfishness and pride rules the mind

Ego and hate decorate the winds,
The air sheds its innocence

Souls are hurting everywhere,
The beauty of woods is no more there,

The flowers have lost their smile,
What can you say about the Poor’s plight?

The difference lies in knowing the truth,
What is required, just some purpose from youth

The forces need to be gathered,
All strength needs to be mustered

Life does carry a greater meaning,
Justice needs to be prevailed

Minds need to be nurtured with knowledge,
The message has to be floated in a carriage

Evil has carried on too far,
Everything seems too bizarre

One should know the use of an arrow,
It’s very necessary to free the sparrow

Food has to be equally shared,
The villain must never be spared

Compassion needs to be upheld and flourished
Spirituality has to be nourished,

God loves everyone amongst us,
But who in the crowd loves him sleepless?

Have to challenge the tides of the night,
Should not get scared of the fleeing knight

People are not good in this world,
Friends & foes, all are without remorse

The winds seem a little too sharp,
The winter carries its own ache

The darkness needs the help of a candle,
We need not rely on the wings of the angel

With others or alone, I have to proceed
The task is never-ending, it is agreed

The journey begins right here,
Don’t panic, with strong faith nothing should be feared!!!

As I walked out one evening,
Walking down Bristol Street,
The crowds upon the pavement
Were fields of harvest wheat.

And down by the brimming river
I heard a lover sing
Under an arch of the railway:
‘Love has no ending.

‘I’ll love you, dear, I’ll love you
Till China and Africa meet,
And the river jumps over the mountain
And the salmon sing in the street,

‘I’ll love you till the ocean
Is folded and hung up to dry
And the seven stars go squawking
Like geese about the sky.

‘The years shall run like rabbits,
For in my arms I hold
The Flower of the Ages,
And the first love of the world.’

But all the clocks in the city
Began to whirr and chime:
‘O let not Time deceive you,
You cannot conquer Time.

‘In the burrows of the Nightmare
Where Justice naked is,
Time watches from the shadow
And coughs when you would kiss.

‘In headaches and in worry
Vaguely life leaks away,
And Time will have his fancy
To-morrow or to-day.

‘Into many a green valley
Drifts the appalling snow;
Time breaks the threaded dances
And the diver’s brilliant bow.

‘O plunge your hands in water,
Plunge them in up to the wrist;
Stare, stare in the basin
And wonder what you’ve missed.

‘The glacier knocks in the cupboard,
The desert sighs in the bed,
And the crack in the tea-cup opens
A lane to the land of the dead.

‘Where the beggars raffle the banknotes
And the Giant is enchanting to Jack,
And the Lily-white Boy is a Roarer,
And Jill goes down on her back.

‘O look, look in the mirror,
O look in your distress:
Life remains a blessing
Although you cannot bless.

‘O stand, stand at the window
As the tears scald and start;
You shall love your crooked neighbour
With your crooked heart.’

It was late, late in the evening,
The lovers they were gone;
The clocks had ceased their chiming,
And the deep river ran on

- Wystan High Auden

Care, affection, love are all small words easy to spell and pronounce. But are heavy in the meaning. They are life with in. Each word so heavy that it can out weigh the entire humanity.

Tonight at this hour, I feel sleepless, restless and find it hard to put my mind in peace. This migrane thats giving me company for past 2 days is not letting me in peace. I some how have started enjoying this pain, may be I am becoming saddest. More over I have perfected in the art of keeping a normal face and not letting anyone know, whats happening inside.

Talking of the world around, I see us becoming selfish, self centered and cruel. We deliberately hurt, give pain and become blind to see what we do to others. We demand selfishly, we seek our desires with cruel hearts and we never pay attention to what price others may be paying to keep us happy.

We expect, demand and want a lot for us. But when its our turn to give and share love we are miser. We live within families where we share our love with parents, siblings, spouse and friends. My question is does love dry by giving? Does it evaporates by sharing? Does it’s flow stops if we care for others?

No it doesn’t rather it come back multiplied as we let it bloom and flourish. We become victim of our selfish desire, fears and jealously and we start destroying the world around us. We hurt those we love. We give pain to our dear ones and we get jealous from those who infact at times live because of us.

We have changed so much. We donot believe in sharing and caring, although we proudly teach our kids. But we never practice it our selves. We prefer breaking the hearts than keeping our hearts open. Yet we expect happiness from Allah. How could we live happily without any guilt. How cheap we are? How brutal we have become? How stuborn our so called love is?

We hurt, we give pain and we break hearts and we never try to look at the other side of the picture. Where by wiping of tears, by supporting and loving others, by giving and sharing love, how much love and affection we might get back. Love never dries, if its tied with chains either it breaks the chains or break the one tied up.

We want everything for us, as we want and as we see. We are becoming machines, machines that lack emotions, love, romance, affection and joy of life. We breathe, walk and live. We have a life thats empty. We have smiles on our faces which are empty, we have eyes without passion and dreams. We cry over our situations but we never bother to realise what made it happen.

Questions, questions and questions. No answers as answers cannot undo whats done, the eyes that once laughed have tears, the laughters once roared are silent, the loved once shared in missing. We are materialist society, where we use humans as commodity. We are keen, lean and mean. We cannot blame anyone for what life we have, as we never tried to improve anyones when it comes to us to make a difference.

I feel bad, hurt and sorry for what is happening around. I want to live my life full of love, but if I am turned into a machine, will I have a life? Why we can’t live in harmony and peace together? Why do we have fears? Why this number game? Why this jealousy and hatered? As all these attributes only bring back dryness. But……….. Again as I said we are selfish, self centered and cruel and with our narrow approach we not only kill others, we close ours doors aswell to love.

Well choose to live by sharing love and in return get multiplied return or be selfish, self centered and narrow and close the doors that bring love to you.

In the end I would ask ‘My Lord’ help me to protect the ones I care and love and give me strength to share my love. As thats what you expect us to do.Ameen

Once long ago, my grand father, who was a very soft, kind hearted and sweet person. Advised me and asked me to remember one thing. ‘what ever you do in life, remember one thing, never hurt any one. Do not be a source of pain and discomfort for a living soul’

I still remember his kind voice and his words. I kept them close to my heart and tried all these years to be helpful and kind to everyone.

I firmly believe that ‘words and tone’ one uses can either make a relation or break a bond. I always try to be a source of comfort for atleast those who are near and dear.

If I look back, I can see myself being used, absued and targetted many times by friends and family. But I am happy even if I was a reason of discomfort, I changed or adjusted myself to the situation. I donot want to end and depart with a heavy heart.

But…….. now it seems a dream far fetched. I have a burden and I am a reason of pain for my dear ones. I am stuck in between, where I am the reason of discomfort. The guilt, shame and its pain uninvitedly haunts me. Kills me with in. I believe Allah always has some secrets and He always has a master plan. But I wonder if in that master plan I will end up with guilt or He will bring back me, my honor and dignity.

Despite all the negativities, darkness, pain, loss of hopes and discomforts. I have always entrusted in His Kindness and his Powers.

I am forgetting how to laugh, my laughters and smiles are empty (I know it), my discomforts and uneasiness is within, I shed my tears secretly, I look at the skies for a ray of light and blessings un noticed. I am trying to keep my soul alive, which is drying and dying gradually. I am fine and I am good is the mask I have mastered on my face.

But am I fine???? With the guilt I have? I never wanted to hurt, I never wanted …….. this…….

I cannot forget and I cannot forgive myself.

All I can say is O’Lord help me. I am not sorry as sorry cannot undo whats done. Yes one thing for sure, I will not forgive myself and will keep on reminding myself so that I live in pain, shame and discomfort.

Gains or Loses ?
Just saw flashes of past today. Past where there was laughter, romance, joy un ending chit chats. Beautiful days and nights. Not very far just lived this past few months back. It was a life that brought so much from all three corners and made us rich and full of life. Care free and care less for the world around.

The new year night, birthdays, anniversaries, weekends when ever we wanted it was a celebration for us.

And then some how, the friendship, fun and life began to rot. All I could do was to control the situation but my efforts went in vain. We still continue live shamelessly egulfed in our selfish ego. The feeling which was mutual and selfless disappeared in thin air. We are now individuals trying to adjust, not realising what we had was a gift of God that we rejected. I am sure we all remember those old days but are self centered to look beyond our individual selves. Rot we will and thats what we bought for ourselves.

2008 I was with empty pockets and life was full of laughters and joy. 2009 is ending by making me rich and taking away all that I had.

Now I am sure people around me are happy as their dreams, desires and wants are fulfilled.

Lets see what this new year eve and the coming year has for me. Somehow I have learnt the art to live. Live with dream less eyes, hollow laughters and a life where I am nothing but a stone. Cheers !!!
I just read my ‘ina nila’ and burried the JUNO I knew all my life.

1 – First Important Lesson – Cleaning Lady.
During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezes through the questions, until I read the last one:
“What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the Cleaning Woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50’s, but how would I know her name?
I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.
“Absolutely”, said the professor. “in your careers you will meet many people. All are significant…they deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say, ‘Hello!’ to them….
I’ve never forgotten that lesson….I also learned her name was Dorothy. Read more »

A long awaited pet that lived a short time with us and passed away this morning , Fluto a name given by my 4 year old Ammo.

It was a cheerful, playful litttle pet who became center of attraction for everyone. Got pampered and looked after by every member of the family.

God the news of his death was so shocking. I left him last night playing around and he was found dead after having breakfast in the garden. I wonder what happend to that poor soul.

I can still hear my daughters loud crying voice “saying Baba Fluto is dead”

Strange the pet of days brought tears in my daughters eyes and broke her and we grown ups, never even care when we hurt our fellow beings.

As promised to my baby doll, she will have her Fluto back. But This Fluto will remain in my memories for a long time.

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle,
When 24 hours in a day is not enough;
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
And start to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
It into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. Read more »

Isn’t it amazing that George Carlin – comedian of the 70’s and 80’s – could write something so very eloquent…and so very appropriate.

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways **, **but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. Read more »

We participate in number of talks and sessions, where empowerment of women is discussed. We give our idea and opinions, we strongly support the idea and it becomes a heated emotional discussion.

That’s all………………….. Yes truly that’s about it. We have made most of the issues, a drawing room discussion. Issues and topics are given a lip service and nothing solid, concrete and particle is ever done.

Empower women, is one of the topics in constant discussion. Recently I had a chance to participate in a training “Gender Sensitization” facilitated by Mr. and Mrs. Imran Rizvi of RIZ Consultancy at Royal Palm, Lahore.

The event was a one day talk session and it really jolted me, when I came to know that Pakistan stands 56 out of 58 countries, where women participation in the main helm of affairs is missing. Just think of it 56th. I know our numbers would be bad as that’s how we have always been somehow lately. But at 56 out of 58 was an eye opener to me. The training went smooth and everyone participated according to his/ her approach, thoughts and opinion. But I got stuck………………..

Yeah as usual, me and my weird thoughts. Why we are at 56? How can we improve in this number game? What all could be done to change our future and improve women participation in all walks of life.

I had chances to travel abroad and look at the culture, traditions, religions, custom and norms with a “non-traditional vision”. I began a memory search of various nearby countries that excelled in past 15 years. The list comprised of India, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Malaysia, Indonesia and North Korea. I sat on internet and I Google (d) few pages and the answer was right there in front of my eyes, exactly as I had thought.

All these countries progressed when, women empowerment began by providing women transport. All these countries had poor public transport system. Instead of spending Billions of dollars to improve public transport, they promoted individual women transport. By introducing “SCOOTY” for women. A simple and affordable solution to 90% of the female population. Self start automatic gear box solution for the ease of women. Read more »