Voice of Common Pakistani !!!

Wrote on June 6, 2009 (no idea why it didn’t get published)

Every relationship has its own kind of bonding. A relationship lives within heart and mind and is strong and motivated till you are willing to keep. Its a commitment with your won self, with your own being and within your heart. The desires to keep a relationship happy makes you mold, twist and re-shape your personality to achieve the optimum level of compatibility.

A relationship between Husband and Wife revolves around the key ingredient, THE CHILDREN. Their laughters their games, their tantarumms and their happiness keeps the two individual close to each other. Once newly wed the bonding is different and it has more of fantacy and less of practicallity. But once the family starts growing, the needs and increased pressure of responsibility starts re-shaping a relationship. People who fail to understand this change will always see at things with a negative point of view and believe that THE ROMANCE is fading. Where as ROMANCE infact goes to a higher level where its not between 2 individuals but a ROMANCE of a family. Read more »

FAITH………..

What is it? What does it mean? How is it defined? Who sets its levels or who decides what Faith is all about?

What faith do I have or if I have any to follow? I am as human as you. I am as guilty as you. I am as innocent as you and I am as smart as you.

I cheat when I can, I am selfish when I choose to be, I hit behind the back, I hurt those who care, I do every bit to run the world as I want it to be. I see the world with my eyes. Its black or white, orange or blue I dont care. All I care is that it should exactly look as I wish to see it. Read more »

Sleepless, stark awake, restless and yet comfortable with warmth of my bed.
After all thats what we humans are. No matter what happens, no matter how much pain we feel when we are hurt, we continue hurting.

I spent my night thinking, dreaming then picking up broken pieces of my dreams, planning and watching my plans fail, talking and finding myself talking to no one but me.

Strange, you live in a world full of people and here I am watching the twilight changing into a bright day and i fail to find any ray of light inside. Its all dark, its all messed up, its all empty. The feeling of loneliness, the fear of being forgotton, the pain of being abandoned are haunting me.

What are we? What do we do in our lives? How we live? Claims we make? Promises we make? Vows we break? We live our lives hurting our dear ones. We say we care but do we? Read more »

So confused, so lost within, so distant and so alone.

Lost is not the word, I am me that I know but who is that me now? I am becoming a stranger to myself with each passing day.

Strange happenings, wierd realizations, confused situations, un decisive moments and unexpected events are changing me on day to day basis.

I do not know if I am getting strong to face new challenges, getting dry or becoming dead gradually. But what ever is happening is affecting me one way or the other.

I am loosing hope, belief and trust on myself. I believed in me and my powers, I trusted me and my strengths, I was proud and flew always high. Believed that I am special and lived in a world of disbelief I guess, where I presumed that ‘main hoon na’

Par main hota kon hoon ??? Kia hoon aur hota kon hoon.

I tried my best but failed, i fell hard and stood again to fall. I got pushed, I got dragged but I never lost hope.

But ……… What am I is one question, I ask myself today and I have no answer for that……..

Living in the world of burgers, pizza, pasta and fries etc. Desi food has always been a treat. The taste, aora and its spice has always triggered hunger to 2 levels up.

Same is the case today, right now and right away. Within office ours lunch break on roads asks for a near by desi food. ‘Channa and Anda’ with coke as topping and ‘garma garam nan’. Who can deny such a feast.

Small outlet, heavily crowded by nearby banks and office staff, voice calling ‘ustad jee nan’ ‘chootay supply le a’.

No matter how advance and modernized we have become. The old Lahore and its touch still lives among us, with its beauty and simplicity.

After all its rightly said ‘Lahore, Lahore hai’.

A long weekend, feeling so fresh, so great………….

Been listening to songs for three days, songs that behold my very own very dear memories. Songs that I shared with someone very special and that someone who is really someone special till day.

WOW………….. Good old days are all I can think of at the moment. My days of struggle and my days of becoming ME complete. I was crazy for one in those old days and now I have three of them All are alike in one way or the other. God I am so lucky ………….. Read more »

Woke up in the middle of the night. Heard something heard some noise ….. but its silence all around. No I am sure I heard something. Was it a ring on my mobile or someone called my name?
Or was it something that rung in me and woke me up? What was it? What I am waiting for? Who I am waiting for? What sound was it?

Been thinking that a lot lately. Spent rest of the night awake, with empty thoughts, brain that does exists but seems to malfunction these days. Voices I hear, visions I see are familiar but belong to some other world. I don’t exist in that world anymore and I will not go back their either. That’s a promise I made to myself.

I am where I am by choice. It’s a choice that I made or was I made to choose?

Anyways whatever, anything for you, anything for you……………….. My existence or non existence whatever makes you happy, whatever comforts you, whatever it takes……….. I will do it for you……….. Read more »

Education is the base of any society. It grooms the new generation and prepares them for the challenges of the future. Education is not only bookish knowledge but a process where a child learns to share, work in group activity, learns self confidence, get acquainted to routine of waking up and sleeping at set timings, get organized and so on.

Unfortunate we are that in our society, Education is commercialized. It’s more of a business than a necessity and responsibility. Govt too is not affected to see what challenges parents may be facing to pay HEAVY amounts in the name of fee, just for the purpose to prepare their children to face the challenges of future. Future of whom Read more »

Smoking !!!!

No one can stop me now

With every puff of my Marlboro Lights, I am sealing the holes one by one. Getting stronger and going deeper in myself, far away from the world to reach and deep enough for anyone to pull me out.

Living with my memories, my crazy thoughts, my choices and my abmitions, my dreams and my freedom. I am happy for one thing……. and that is, I have no guilt, no sorrow, no after thoughts and no pain as I did not harm or hurt anyone. I lived for my family, friends, co workers and collegues all my life. May be I was not good enough to be appreciated, loved, cared or pampered. Read more »

Mon to Sat its work, work and work, weekend is a time to relax mind and body. Today I just had my week that just ends.

I kept myself busy all the while on my laptop, as there wasn’t anything else to do, so I started downloading songs. So far I have downloaded a huge collection of Michael Bolton, Bryan Adams, Beethoven and still down loading best ever 1000 billboard top charts songs. Read more »