Voice of Common Pakistani !!!

Negative thoughts are the enemies of victorious life. Since our life is very much determined by our mind, our thoughts can make or break our life. Negative thoughts will distract your focus from the important and drain your energy. At the end, you will no longer have the ingredients necessary for success. Knowing how to overcome negative thoughts may make the difference between victory and defeat.

I believe there is an important principle at work regarding negative thoughts, and that is: Read more »

This post is inspired by a picture I saw on a friends office desktop (thx Ali for sharing this pic). The day I saw this pic I was truely attracted to the view and the vision it had. I knew the very instant what this pic meant to me and how I see through the pic.

There is always a path we follow, a way to walk and a journey ahead. Life too is a journey. Good or bad, rough or paved its an unwritten path we walk on to an unseen destination. Life has its beauties that unfold while we walk on its laid path. It brings sorrow’s and moments that we repent at times.

There are always two ways to walk on the road to unseen destination (destination that’s either a dream or a goal).

One, you keep looking around to enjoy the beauty around or to look for the ugliness its has, or

Two, you keep your focus on what’s in your hand and let the world pass by with all its beauty and ugliness.

To me holding on tight to what’s in my hand is far better than being worried about what’s around. It hepls me focus and enjoy what I have, it gives me moments to admire my small world within the world around me and it let’s me cherish the moments I have in hand, without being worried about what passes by.

Its not that I close my eyes from the surroundings. I do cherish the beauty around and I do get affected with the ugliness too but since my grip stays tight on what I am holding on to, it brings me back to my small world.

The picture here is a true picture of my vision of life. Try it, I assure you, you’ll love the view of your small world in your hands.

Let the handle turn left and right, let the wheels take the bumps, if you wanna enjoy your ride, enjoy by holding on to whats in hand and feel the comfort without getting carried away by the passing by view or the bumps below.

Life is a sign of living; it introduces to changes, changes within and changes of the surroundings. It takes away present into future and converts it into memories. Memories that become either asset for a person or a burden that becomes unbearable.

It’s a backpack that everyone carries. Some have lighter and some are not fortunate and have to carry heavy loads. But within the pile of load one has to carry are many items that can and may be left out of the back pack, to keep it lighter. This leaving out additional unnecessary items is the experience of life and the ability to handle a situation. Life itself is imprisonment, imprisonment of choices, demands, expectations and wants. It’s a prison that one cannot break.

Living within the high walls one hallucinates to be free and independent. One believes to be the master of his/ her life. But in fact no one is free and no one is independent. It’s a caged life and we get so used to from the start, living within these unseen bars that we start feeling free.

Freedom within cage too comes with a price, price that at times adds to the burden one carries, or at times price, that comes after a barter of wants and expectations. Life …….. so uncertain, un predictable and yet so very important. You live and continue to live no matter how heavy the back pack gets. Human’s are made to run they cannot walk when over burdened or strapped they collapse. Humans are like shark, the faster they move the longer they live.

Key to success and happy life is maneuvering between wants & expectations, dreams and demands and choices and prices one has to pay.

Keep on paying the price to enjoy your freedom within Life Imprisionment.

Care, affection, love are all small words easy to spell and pronounce. But are heavy in the meaning. They are life with in. Each word so heavy that it can out weigh the entire humanity.

Tonight at this hour, I feel sleepless, restless and find it hard to put my mind in peace. This migrane thats giving me company for past 2 days is not letting me in peace. I some how have started enjoying this pain, may be I am becoming saddest. More over I have perfected in the art of keeping a normal face and not letting anyone know, whats happening inside.

Talking of the world around, I see us becoming selfish, self centered and cruel. We deliberately hurt, give pain and become blind to see what we do to others. We demand selfishly, we seek our desires with cruel hearts and we never pay attention to what price others may be paying to keep us happy.

We expect, demand and want a lot for us. But when its our turn to give and share love we are miser. We live within families where we share our love with parents, siblings, spouse and friends. My question is does love dry by giving? Does it evaporates by sharing? Does it’s flow stops if we care for others?

No it doesn’t rather it come back multiplied as we let it bloom and flourish. We become victim of our selfish desire, fears and jealously and we start destroying the world around us. We hurt those we love. We give pain to our dear ones and we get jealous from those who infact at times live because of us.

We have changed so much. We donot believe in sharing and caring, although we proudly teach our kids. But we never practice it our selves. We prefer breaking the hearts than keeping our hearts open. Yet we expect happiness from Allah. How could we live happily without any guilt. How cheap we are? How brutal we have become? How stuborn our so called love is?

We hurt, we give pain and we break hearts and we never try to look at the other side of the picture. Where by wiping of tears, by supporting and loving others, by giving and sharing love, how much love and affection we might get back. Love never dries, if its tied with chains either it breaks the chains or break the one tied up.

We want everything for us, as we want and as we see. We are becoming machines, machines that lack emotions, love, romance, affection and joy of life. We breathe, walk and live. We have a life thats empty. We have smiles on our faces which are empty, we have eyes without passion and dreams. We cry over our situations but we never bother to realise what made it happen.

Questions, questions and questions. No answers as answers cannot undo whats done, the eyes that once laughed have tears, the laughters once roared are silent, the loved once shared in missing. We are materialist society, where we use humans as commodity. We are keen, lean and mean. We cannot blame anyone for what life we have, as we never tried to improve anyones when it comes to us to make a difference.

I feel bad, hurt and sorry for what is happening around. I want to live my life full of love, but if I am turned into a machine, will I have a life? Why we can’t live in harmony and peace together? Why do we have fears? Why this number game? Why this jealousy and hatered? As all these attributes only bring back dryness. But……….. Again as I said we are selfish, self centered and cruel and with our narrow approach we not only kill others, we close ours doors aswell to love.

Well choose to live by sharing love and in return get multiplied return or be selfish, self centered and narrow and close the doors that bring love to you.

In the end I would ask ‘My Lord’ help me to protect the ones I care and love and give me strength to share my love. As thats what you expect us to do.Ameen

Once long ago, my grand father, who was a very soft, kind hearted and sweet person. Advised me and asked me to remember one thing. ‘what ever you do in life, remember one thing, never hurt any one. Do not be a source of pain and discomfort for a living soul’

I still remember his kind voice and his words. I kept them close to my heart and tried all these years to be helpful and kind to everyone.

I firmly believe that ‘words and tone’ one uses can either make a relation or break a bond. I always try to be a source of comfort for atleast those who are near and dear.

If I look back, I can see myself being used, absued and targetted many times by friends and family. But I am happy even if I was a reason of discomfort, I changed or adjusted myself to the situation. I donot want to end and depart with a heavy heart.

But…….. now it seems a dream far fetched. I have a burden and I am a reason of pain for my dear ones. I am stuck in between, where I am the reason of discomfort. The guilt, shame and its pain uninvitedly haunts me. Kills me with in. I believe Allah always has some secrets and He always has a master plan. But I wonder if in that master plan I will end up with guilt or He will bring back me, my honor and dignity.

Despite all the negativities, darkness, pain, loss of hopes and discomforts. I have always entrusted in His Kindness and his Powers.

I am forgetting how to laugh, my laughters and smiles are empty (I know it), my discomforts and uneasiness is within, I shed my tears secretly, I look at the skies for a ray of light and blessings un noticed. I am trying to keep my soul alive, which is drying and dying gradually. I am fine and I am good is the mask I have mastered on my face.

But am I fine???? With the guilt I have? I never wanted to hurt, I never wanted …….. this…….

I cannot forget and I cannot forgive myself.

All I can say is O’Lord help me. I am not sorry as sorry cannot undo whats done. Yes one thing for sure, I will not forgive myself and will keep on reminding myself so that I live in pain, shame and discomfort.

Gains or Loses ?
Just saw flashes of past today. Past where there was laughter, romance, joy un ending chit chats. Beautiful days and nights. Not very far just lived this past few months back. It was a life that brought so much from all three corners and made us rich and full of life. Care free and care less for the world around.

The new year night, birthdays, anniversaries, weekends when ever we wanted it was a celebration for us.

And then some how, the friendship, fun and life began to rot. All I could do was to control the situation but my efforts went in vain. We still continue live shamelessly egulfed in our selfish ego. The feeling which was mutual and selfless disappeared in thin air. We are now individuals trying to adjust, not realising what we had was a gift of God that we rejected. I am sure we all remember those old days but are self centered to look beyond our individual selves. Rot we will and thats what we bought for ourselves.

2008 I was with empty pockets and life was full of laughters and joy. 2009 is ending by making me rich and taking away all that I had.

Now I am sure people around me are happy as their dreams, desires and wants are fulfilled.

Lets see what this new year eve and the coming year has for me. Somehow I have learnt the art to live. Live with dream less eyes, hollow laughters and a life where I am nothing but a stone. Cheers !!!
I just read my ‘ina nila’ and burried the JUNO I knew all my life.

FAITH………..

What is it? What does it mean? How is it defined? Who sets its levels or who decides what Faith is all about?

What faith do I have or if I have any to follow? I am as human as you. I am as guilty as you. I am as innocent as you and I am as smart as you.

I cheat when I can, I am selfish when I choose to be, I hit behind the back, I hurt those who care, I do every bit to run the world as I want it to be. I see the world with my eyes. Its black or white, orange or blue I dont care. All I care is that it should exactly look as I wish to see it. Read more »

Sleepless, stark awake, restless and yet comfortable with warmth of my bed.
After all thats what we humans are. No matter what happens, no matter how much pain we feel when we are hurt, we continue hurting.

I spent my night thinking, dreaming then picking up broken pieces of my dreams, planning and watching my plans fail, talking and finding myself talking to no one but me.

Strange, you live in a world full of people and here I am watching the twilight changing into a bright day and i fail to find any ray of light inside. Its all dark, its all messed up, its all empty. The feeling of loneliness, the fear of being forgotton, the pain of being abandoned are haunting me.

What are we? What do we do in our lives? How we live? Claims we make? Promises we make? Vows we break? We live our lives hurting our dear ones. We say we care but do we? Read more »

So confused, so lost within, so distant and so alone.

Lost is not the word, I am me that I know but who is that me now? I am becoming a stranger to myself with each passing day.

Strange happenings, wierd realizations, confused situations, un decisive moments and unexpected events are changing me on day to day basis.

I do not know if I am getting strong to face new challenges, getting dry or becoming dead gradually. But what ever is happening is affecting me one way or the other.

I am loosing hope, belief and trust on myself. I believed in me and my powers, I trusted me and my strengths, I was proud and flew always high. Believed that I am special and lived in a world of disbelief I guess, where I presumed that ‘main hoon na’

Par main hota kon hoon ??? Kia hoon aur hota kon hoon.

I tried my best but failed, i fell hard and stood again to fall. I got pushed, I got dragged but I never lost hope.

But ……… What am I is one question, I ask myself today and I have no answer for that……..

A long weekend, feeling so fresh, so great………….

Been listening to songs for three days, songs that behold my very own very dear memories. Songs that I shared with someone very special and that someone who is really someone special till day.

WOW………….. Good old days are all I can think of at the moment. My days of struggle and my days of becoming ME complete. I was crazy for one in those old days and now I have three of them All are alike in one way or the other. God I am so lucky ………….. Read more »